Yes, I know, 2 entries in one day. It's a fuckin' miracle. Alert the media! And within about 3 hours of themselves. Go figure. Anyway, I got to thinking (I know, uh oh!) and wanted to write some more.

First off, I've been reading some diaries and there's a lot being said about kids. Uncle Bob has one on the way and is wondering about the trials and tribulations of fatherhood. Gawain has an entry about the little monsters that frequent the C.S.O.G. and finally, Ostracized tells about his absent father. That entry really got to me. I sometimes don't realize how good I've had it having both parents around all the time when I was younger and growing up in a home full of love and family. I forget that there are people out there who've had to struggle and grow up much faster than I have. My hats off to all of you. But this, unfortunately, isn't what this part of the entry is about. The other night, I was watching HBO and they had a comedy special with D.L. Hughley. I know it was an old one because I saw it last year. Anyway, he gets to talking about his father. His father, kind of like Ostracized's, left when he was very young. D.L., however, was brought up by a wonderful stepfather and he took that stepfather's name. While talking about this time in his life, he's completely serious and has set the jokes aside and he says something that really struck me. He said, "It takes a real man to raise another man's seed." And it hit me.

I turned to my wife, who was at the computer but was sort of watching, and before I could ask her she looked at me and said, "Yes, you're a real man." See, our 4-year-old son, isn't mine. His biological father lit out on my wife when she was about 2 months pregnant and won't even claim that the child is his. Shit like this burns my ass to no end. Men today (and some women, but mostly men) need to start taking some fucking responsibility for their actions. Luckily, Marcus (the 4-year-old, yes, that's his real name, but Demonchild fits better except I'm totally serious here) never got a chance to know his biological father. As far as he knows, I'm his real father in every sense of the word and I'm going to keep it that way. We need to get his last name changed, but other than that, I don't ever want him to know about his biological father. That term shouldn't even apply to him anymore. I love that kid like he was my own. It's really odd too. Everywhere we go, everyone tells us that he looks just like me. Except for the brown eyes, people would never in a million years guess that he's not mine. But he is now. I moved away from my family and friends to move to a strange state, all because of a woman I met on the internet. I knew she had a son. And I started taking financial responsibility for that son. And still do. So, if you don't mind for a minute, I'm going to blow my own horn and say I'm a real fuckin' man, man!. Thanks.

Oh, and Ostra (or Elf), I like your choice #2. From reading Waterbelle's diary, it sounds like you're great with kids. You, yourself, professed that you love kids. I, in my humble opinion, couldn't see a better candidate for a father (except of course for Uncle Bob), so I say, when you're ready you go for it. The kid is going to be very lucky.

Ok, enough sappy stuff. As you will probably have noticed, I've updated and added to my buttons on the left. These are all the diaries that I read regularly. If yours is not listed there, I'm sorry, I just haven't gotten around to it. It doesn't mean that yours is any less cooler than these, I'm just a fat, lazy, bastard who reads really slowly. There are even some out of the ones that I read, mainly Kelly (who, by the way, didn't password protect her diary after all), that update so often that I can't keep up and now I'm behind. Also, they're listed in alphabetical order, so don't go bitchin' that someone is listed above you. It doesn't mean I like them any better. You want to be listed higher, change your name. No, really, don't go changing for me...that's stupid. Keep it reall, baybeee!

In past entries, I've spoken (typed actually) about our pet rats. Well, now I have some pics of them if anyone is interested. If you want to see the lovely boys and girls you can check out the Silver Moon Rattery page. It's my wife's page. I did the moon graphic. It's cool. Anyway, those are our 2 boys and if you follow the "Our Rats" link, you can see everyone else. Go check it out, I'm sure they'll be glad to hear that people are looking at them. Enjoy!

Ok, well that's it for now. I'm sure I'll think of something else I'll want to write about, but I'll just hold on to it. You never know when I'll have diary block again and it will come in handy. Till next ish.

"Where are we going and why am I in this handbasket?"

Icebear

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